As far as positive emotions go, inspiration hits me the most. Granted, it doesn’t bite as often as I’d like, neither does it last long enough to count. Nevertheless, inspiration feels quite good when it lands.
I used to depend on it a lot as a young writer. As a storyteller, I’ve had to learn to forge it in the land of procrastination and responsibilities. It’s very easy to be inspired when things are going well. It’s a lot harder when shit hits the fan.
The older I get, the more I learn how to imbue inspiration onto mundane things. You know, stories, art, even cooking and music. The tools of the muse so to speak.
For instance, I have this thing where I treat myself to kdramas and games whenever I hit milestones. I’ll deliberately pause playing or watching them at crucial moments so that the anticipation to go back to it drives me past editing or rendering.
In truth and from experience, inspiration is quite powerful. It’s also very volatile. Kind of like a really hot, toxic ex who keeps popping up unexpectedly and sweeping me off my feet. Sense tells me not to depend on them, but I’m often too horny and delusional to see sense.
Of course I know better now. I cannot wholly depend on inspiration. It’s not tangible enough to reproduce. That’s why I think of it as ambience nowadays.
Inspiration helps. But it’s not important enough that not having it debilitates activity. Like lofi music or a snack, it’s there to keep me going, but not the main drive. Which means I can turn it off or on when I need to or snack on it bit by bit to sustain me.
Either which way it’s a fun thing to have around and learning to use it does produce some very nice things in the long run.
